 SMACKDOWN VS.
RAW 2008
REVIEW
That's right
Wrestling fans, and Wrestling Game fans, and fans of The
Wrestling Fan, and fans of reviews by the Wrestling Fan
of Wrestling games for Wrestling fans, I am your noble
host Sean Carless, and welcome to the official TWF
review of THQ's newest entry in the celebrated
Smackdown series, "WWE Smackdown vs.
RAW 2008!" Now Featuring ECW. Their official
catchphrase is
"How will you play?";
and if you're anything like the list of shmoes
I've spent the better part of the two days competing
against, the answer is probably "really terribly". But
hey, that doesn't mean this game is. Anything but,
actually. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't derive
hours of enjoyment from it. And not just because it
finally gave me a legal avenue in which I
could potentially run down Vince
McMahon with a car, or set him on fire. I
swear.
That said, I
have to take my hat off to THQ here, but only for a
second because it's covering an unsightly bald spot, as
with each new game they release, they seem to at least
improve somewhat on the previous incarnation. This is
the case once again. There's still quite a few issues,
sure, some that obviously need to be re-tooled, or in
some cases completely overhauled (That I will get to
shortly), but for the most part, THQ has once again
delivered a game that can be played again and again,
with no waning of enthusiasm. Not too many games can
make that claim. And that's what usually sets Wrestling
titles apart from other games. With most titles, once
you complete the designated mission, the game becomes
somewhat obsolete and boring. Not these games. They
contain so many varying possibilities of continuous
game-play and custom creativity that you can keep going
back, creating your own really terribly self-designed
CAW (Create-A-Wrestler), loading his awkward ass with
way too much apparel, and then taking that hopeless
eye-sore to the World Title, time and time again! And
all without certain people in the front office whose
name rhyme with, umm, John Laurinaitis, telling you that
you have the wrong look, and don't know how to work main
event style. Although, they're right. You're
ridiculous.
Had Kane just made copies of that
evil videotape 7 days before, this whole sorted
mess could have been
avoided. |
Anyway, Wrestling Games
have always grabbed me, and every
November, I find myself buying whatever title
has been released. From the good old days of
wrestlers with non-defined catcher's mitts for hands in
WWF War Zone, to Giant 9 foot anorexic,
pigment-free Andrew "Test" Martin's in original
SmackDown, to an entire year of career-mode
storylines culminating in a usually silent,
masked-Kane of all people telling Vince McMahon to
"Shut his Mouth", I have become
unconditionally HOOKED on these games. I don't know
what it is. Perhaps, I, much like CM Punk, am
ADDICTED TO COMPETITION? It's true. I've tried
getting myself and Punker booked on A&E's
intervention, but thus far, no dice. Apparently "alcohol
abuse" and "drug dependency" take precedence over an
inane need to apply top wristlocks and jump off really
high objects. Oh well.
That said,
I may not know what it is about these games
that grab me so much, but what I do know is, if you
thought it was difficult enough before explaining
to your Girlfriend why you watch sweaty dudes in their
underwear roll around with one another every Monday,
Tuesday and Friday, try then explaining from there, why you then spend
3 MORE HOURS EVERY
DAY pretending to be these same
Speedo-laden heroes. And, ya, also try explaining to her
what the Hell was going on when you were
accidentally busted tossing a CAW likeness of her to her
demise off the top of the Hell in the Cell. Trust me. It
wasn't pretty. But hey, neither is she, so no harm no
foul. (I'm single, ladies!
*Ahem*.).
"I'm still Hungry! Bring me more Tag
teams!" |
So, this takes
us to the game in question. And the best part is,
to my knowledge, this is the first WWE game ever
available on EVERY SINGLE current gaming
console. So, if you possess
the incessant need to physically
pantomime Bobby Lashley on your Wii, throwing virtual
clotheslines, convincing neighbors that catch glimpse of
your spastic uncoordinated histrionics through the
window that you're either epileptic, retarded or
both, that's clearly your business. I
personally chose both the X-Box 360 and PS3, my two
current favorite systems to test this bad boy out on.
And not just because it's the only systems I own. Not
even.
So, join me now
as we break this mother down. It's Smackdown vs. RAW
2008!: The closest thing to really being in the
ring!... minus being pinned, with two more of your
friends, by Triple H, at the same time. Just
because. I don't make the
rules.
TIME TO PLAY
GAME WHAHAHA:
There
are several new wrinkles to the game this year, and no I
don't mean a newer rendition of that aging
Stark ravin' Hulkster, dude. By that I mean, THQ
has once again tweaked the controls. Why they decided to
change this, and not say
alter the A.I., so guys don't repeatedly commit suicide
off the sides of the Elimination Chamber like crazed
lemmings is beyond me. But in this case, based on last
year's alterations to the control settings, it has
definitely been significantly improved and simplified.This time around, the
right stick plays even more of a prominent role in the
game, primarily with the introduction of the new
"struggle submission system";
and no, that's not another term for how Mike
Tyson likes to end his dates, but rather a newer,
more realistic approach to applying submission holds.
Now when you're grinding your foe into submission on the
mat, you will pull or push the right trigger in the
direction in which will administer more pain. The
more tenaciously you move the stick, the more
pressure is applied. It's that simple. Got the
guy in a Boston Crab? Well, pull back in the
opposite direction, and stretch those legs, chief. Soon
he'll resemble the absolutely real giant crustaceans
found on the Massachusetts sea board that look like
upside down men with legs behind their heads screaming
in anguish. Such a creature HAS to exist for wrestling
to create a wrestling hold in its honor, right?
Right?
In any event,
this newer simplified system brings a new level of
realism to the games. If only applying
realistic holds was that simple in real life. I'm
sure guys like the Miz wish it was. There's no
proper button combinations in real-life to
simplify what he thinks it is he's doing out
there. Anyway, on the opposite end of the
spectrum, to escape the holds
once they're applied to YOU? it's basically
the same deal. You rock that bad boy until somehow
you squirm free or get to the ropes for the clean
break. So, this pretty much ends all
the button mashing you usually see in these
scenarios. However, it has done little to dissuade
my immature poor-sportsmanship and constant cursing and
yelling while my wrestler is trapped in submission
holds. I still demand he not
quit under threat that I will destroy him in CAW
edit as if he's a real person. I clearly have issues.
But he still should know
better.
Sadly, this would be the very last
time Mr. Kennedy asked Ric if he wanted to go
Bowling. |
That said,
besides the submission holds, right
trigger is pretty much used for
everything. Including to access your Ultimate Control Move (mine for the
record is telling girlfriends that they're losing
their looks and that they'll never get a man like
me again who'll accept all their foibles), which
is now accomplished by pushing up on right trigger,
followed by R3. This will now allow you to
manipulate the poor bastard that much easier
to drag him over and say, ram him
face-first into the steel steps, or throw his ass
onto the announce table. From there, you can then
just pretend it's the now-forgotten Spanish version, and
dedicate your impending wanton destruction to the
non-existent pixilated Hugo and Carlos, who'd no doubt
be scurrying for their very animated lives at this
moment.
Another HUGE
change to the game is that every WWE Superstar is now
defined by a unique fighting
style. The Showman for
flashier moves and crowd-pleasing histrionics; Dirty for well, guys who don't like
to play by the rules; Technical
for guys who do; High Flying, for guys like
Rey Mysterio; Brawler for guys who, you got it,
brawl; Hardcore for guys who
use weapons and no doubt enjoy full penetration in their
pornography; Submission
Artist for those who use submission holds, then
no doubt have the artistic ability to paint and sculpt
detailed interpretations of said holds, or maybe just
first part; and of course Powerhouse, for those big, strong,
slower moving guys who no doubt only have their job
based solely on the fact that they're the only guys on
earth for whom Spandex is not one size fits all.
(cough*MarkHenry*cough).
"The bottom
lines" as our friend Santino Marella would say is that
each wrestler's unique fighting style basically
prevents that superstar from doing
uncharacteristic things they'd sooner NEVER do.
Like Rey Mysterio giving a tombstone to Kane for
example, or Triple H graciously putting over new
talent. Or maybe just they Rey one. I
heard they tried the latter but apparently like
raising Bobby Lashley's charisma stats, IT'S
IMPOSSIBLE. After all, THQ aren't miracle
workers!
That said, each
wrestler you create gets to choose from TWO of these
distinct styles, with one acting as his
primary
style. The only real drawback is the lack of
full explanation or tutorial on how to master the
unique nuances of each style. There's some basic
tutorials available in the game, but for the most
part, you'll have to play it by ear. However, once
you do somehow figure it out, it rules all kinds of Ass.
Or just one kind, since asses are all kind of
the same when you get down to it. For instance, when
playing as a known rule-breaker like Randy Orton or
Edge, you can beg off, and use the Referee as a human
shield, and then toss him into your unsuspecting
opponent. And when playing as say, Mysterio, you can
quickly pull off desperation pins in dire situations
like the dreaded POSSUM PIN.
I've personally never been rolled into a complicated
cradle by possums while trying to shoe them off my
property, but if WWE says that rodents possesses keen
catch-as-catch can wrestling skills, who am I to
argue?
Needless to say, John Cena and Rey
Mysterio's new take on Dicken's 'A Christmas
Carol' didn't exactly impress
Producers... |
And while we're
speaking of moves, there's a SLEW of new holds to choose
from here. Hell, there's even a new RKO, where you catch
a wrestler jumping off the top rope and counter it in
mid-air into an RKO! Awesome. However, unfortunately for
Randy, there's still no tweaks to his
vaunted chin-lock. So, you'll have to be
content in just being really really boring with
only one kind of rest-hold. Oh
well.
Another great
new addition is the "Hall Of
Fame" mode, where you can relive 12 specific
historic WWE moments, which will in turn help you unlock
certain purchasable items. Some of these 12
historic moments in question include beating Steve
Austin in an "I quit match"; and yes, in this case, he
still shows up when finds out he's scheduled to lose;
and HBK beating Bret Hart at Wrestlemania 12
in an Iron-Man match... that subsequently sent him
on a downward spiral to tragedy and despair and in
essence wrecked his life forever. YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. There's not
too many games out there that allow you
to retroactively break a human being's spirit and
desire completely, so hats off to THQ here. The
best part though, is that unlike other previous version
of "Iron Man" in the previous games, you don't have
to toil around bored for an hour straight,
because they're now in 10-20 minute intervals. Just
enough time for you to decimate your competition without
the worry of growing tired of repeatedly
pinning them. Anyone without the last
name Hearst-Helmsley will likely appreciate
this one.
The rest of the
match modes are your usual suspects, ranging from Hell
in the Cell, First Blood, TLC, and Elimination
Chamber. Hell, even the "Buried Alive match" is back
again. Thankfully sans the awkward burying
of the real-life "just expired" Eddie Guerrero
like in 2006's version. And no, a certain GUY WHO
NEVER EXISTED is not available in this game, so no
chance of repeating that macabre moment again with the
Wolverine, who if JR's commentary for the last 7
years is to be believed was RABID. WWE wouldn't lie
to us. Stop this steroids and concussion business,
media. And look into the real culprit: RABIES. And hell,
look for the animal (Batista? George Steele? Joe
Lauranaitis?) that infected him in the first place! It's
not too late!
Anyway, THQ has
a very decent line-up of match types available. But
basically bar one that I'll get to shortly, they're the
exact same match-types we've seen in the past 4
games. For the record, what's once again absent
though, is the Divas "Fulfill your Fantasy"
match from 2006. Go figure. You remember that, right?
You know, the match where the only way to win was
to strip the woman to her underwear and bend her over
and spank her bare ass? Maybe that's not that bad
of an idea to scrap that one.Turns out women don't
actually appreciate that in real-life as much as
you'd think they would. Believe me, I know. Maybe
next time I'll introduce myself first. Wish me
luck.
However, that
all said, the BEST game mode, and in my-ever-so-humble
opinion, the selling feature
for this particular title is the addition of the ECW Rules match.
Finally, a realistic depiction of what ECW is
supposed to be. So for those
of you born after 1994 who *really wanted* to
re-enact a really "exciting" tete-a-tete
between Kevin Thorn and Mike Knox, umm, sucks to be you?
Instead, THQ has brought back the classic ECW
environment, (only the wrestlers get paid here, I
presume) with all sorts of HARDCORE HI-JINKS abounding.
That's right, fans will literally hold up weapons for
you to grab and pummel your opposition with. And if
that's not enough, there's an all-new weapon system
in place in this match. Now when you stick your grubby
paws under the ring, it'll access a weapon wheel, from
which you can then choose the item you wish to part
your foe's hair with. This is a HUGE improvement over
choosing the same exact weapon time and time again. The
only drawback, at least to me, is that the weapons once
again, after being expunged of their usefulness,
just glow and disappear forever. Who designed that
function? OJ Simpson? That would clearly come in
handy for him, I guess.
A word of warning: Never leave Kane
hanging when he demands a High-
Five. |
But wait,
that's not all! There is one more caveat to this mode
that bowls the rest over: FIRE. Yes, it's true. Now
you can light barb-wired covered 2X4's and even tables
on FIRE! Those of us addicted to Rasslin' gaming will
remember the last time fire was used in a U.S. game was
ECW's Anarchy Rulz for original Playstation. Only unlike
that game,
this game's version only leads to an easy
pin, and not the screaming, agonizing ultimate demise of
Little Guido Maritato, physically disintegrating in the
ring encompassing blaze. Those of you who played
that game will know EXACTLY what I'm talking
about.
The Career mode
has also undertaken some radical changes. It's now
combining GM mode and Career mode into one mutant
hybrid known as the 24/7
mode. You can play as a GM, putting together
matches, drafting superstars, and running the day to day
nuances of a wrestling promotion... and all without
being sabotaged by Stephanie McMahon, who rapes your
brand of any of its originality and appeal and forces
you to build the show around three dancing bimbos. Glad
we cleared that up. The other side sees your WWE
superstar of choice, or no-name hero of your
creating, attempt to battle their way to Legend status. The real hard part
though is preventing your superstar from getting
injured. If you run the poor bastard ragged, in an
attempt to gain the most dolla dolla bills (Tm. Teddy
Long) possible, that's exactly what will
happen. You'll get an email from the GM stating that
your Superstar has suffered an injury and will
in turn miss X number of weeks. The problem arising
though is that he doesn't miss that time, and you'll be
forced to wrestle hurt anyway, starting all your
bouts in the red, and being more prone to
defeat and further injury! Man, someone needs to
give Nancy Grace a call! This is outrageous!
Where's Marc Mero with his revised list of
deceased animated wrestlers when you need him to
put an end to this by gawd
chicanery?
Anyway, despite
the injury handicap, if you wrestle smartly,
there's still a chance you can prevail, but make one
mistake and well, you're toast. It can
definitely lead to a tedious amount of
helplessness. I'm not really bothered by it as much,
because I wrestle incredibly dirty anyway, but I
understand how someone might not dig
it.(Sucka).
For the
record, someone told me (I'm still not
sure) that you can rehab your Superstar by sending
him for massages and what not, but this apparently
affects your popularity. I think I know what they
mean. I always lose my appeal when I go for massages.
Maybe it's because I keep turning over and asking
for a happy ending? I'm not allowed back now. Did I do
it wrong?
As for the
storylines themselves, truth be told, I haven't gotten
too deep yet, so I cannot condemn or praise
it completely. Hopefully, though, unlike
last year, you won't have to compete in a
nonsensical ladder match with Chris Masters(?!).
Who'd ever book that? I can only hope that much like
THQ's Smackdown Here Comes the Pain in 2003, this
version includes Classic Undertaker having the
opportunity to umm, "bury a stiff" with Torrie Wilson
in the locker-room shower. That was the
single greatest thing EVER in the entire
history of Wrestling themed video games, and one I dare
say, other than Goldberg disturbingly drinking from a
milk hose in the very same game, can never be equaled or
surpassed again.
That said, unfortunately,
much like it's been in the last few
years, this career mode (at least from what I've
observed thus far) is pretty
much basically the same old repetition of
identical storylines no matter what character
you choose. And to add a little bit of ironic humor
to the proceedings, often, you'll find yourself
suddenly palling around with the same dude who
vehemently tried to murder you not a few minutes before.
That's sweet. I mean, why not
respectfully greet and shake the hand of the
dude who just attacked you and put you in a wheelchair
after trying to kill you with a car? Who'd hold grudges
over something that trivial?
Oh, and before
I forget, you'll be happy to know that
no matter how long you play, it stays 2008 forever. But hey, that's expected,
I guess. After all, the real WWE's been "1998" for
ten years now. But still, flaws aside, it's an
enjoyable experience, and for once, a relatively tough
odyssey to complete. That's a bonus where I come from
(parts unknown for the record). Anything that prolongs
my gaming experience is a good thing in my book. So,
when the paramedics find my body this weekend in a
frozen, deformed rigor-mortis-like state like that dude
from The Ring, you'll have THQ to
thank.
Create-A-Superstar is
pretty much the exact same as it was last year,
bar a few cool new props like a Cobra Commander
hood~! There's also less face-paints, but more
hairdo's. So, if you for some reason once again feel
compelled to make Harry Potter or Victoria Beckham's
husband for no logical reason, their hair do's
(hair don'ts?) are all there.
The bodies,
also like last year, are better mapped and can once
again be adorned with disturbing butter-like sheen. My
only issue, and one that I have had for almost every
game this engine has produced, is that as far as body
types go, you cannot realistically reproduce a truly
morbidly obese wrestler. You can only build your created
player to a certain bulk, so re-creating say,
a Yokozuna CAW is impossible, realism wise. I mean,
so much for creating a realistic depiction of the
average online wrestling critic. The unwavering
negativity and feeling of self-importance just
won't be the same without the corresponding bulk that
makes him a true member of the IWC. (Internet Wrestling
Community).
The rest of the
Create-A-Whatever modes are also similar with a
couple of MAJOR exceptions. One is CREATE-A-BELT.
Not only are there all new templates to choose
from, but now you can actually watch two CPU opponents
face off for your belt, and
it can even be put into tournaments,etc.
This is a HUGE improvement in my opinion. Because
sometimes, you just want to watch two no-hopers kick the
crap out of each other for little reward, bar a
belt that's meaningless to everyone else in the world.
Or maybe that's just how Vince McMahon books the
Cruiserweight division. I can't
remember.
The OTHER huge change, and by god,
for the better, is that in the X-Box version you can
FINALLY derive music from your hard-drive to give your
CAW's unique theme music! This makes me so
unbelievably happy, as finally, I can create a CAW of
yours me'ly that can enter the fracas to the melodious
sounds of Tiny Tim's "
Living
In The Sunlight, Loving In The
Moonlight". Unfortunately though, for PS3'ers, this
is NOT an option. Boo. There's really no excuse for it,
honestly, as PS3 has a larger hard drive. The PS2,
I'd understand, for obvious reasons. But the PS3? Come
on. The saving grace though is that PS3
does have a first person mode
for ring entrances. You still can't see ringside
fans laughing and pointing at the hideousness of your
created player, but it's as close to reality as you're
going to get. But it's still not the same without
custom music. I guess those of us who choose to
break out the PS3 version, will just have to scour the
included tracks for songs that don't contain a
ridiculously obvious WWE sound-byte to start them off,
or the collective works of DJ Bumpy
Knuckles.
To his surprise, HHH found
out pretty quickly why Bobby Lashley is always a
favorite amongst the
Divas. |
"GRAPHICS &
OTHER TECHNICAL DO-
HICKERY":
As far as the
graphics go, they'll either marvel or disappoint,
depending on what it is you're looking for. I personally
loved it. Technically, the animation is sharp and
detailed, as on a HDTV you can notice really cool
nuances like the leather fibers on Undertaker's coat, or
the five remaining hairs atop Shawn Michael's head; but
that said, they're being a little *generous* in
most cases with muscle-tone. I mean, Ric Flair has a
six-pack! And I don't mean the first of many beers with
an inebriated Arn Anderson, just because, but
rather ABS. Seriously,
Ric Flair hasn't had Abs since JFK decided it'd be
nice to ride with the convertible roof down.
Just saying. But other than that, the actual
ring-entrance movements of the wrestlers are
practically FLAWLESS. Thank God. Gone are the days of
Randy Orton making his way to the ring all bow-legged,
looking like he's desperately trying to avoid dropping a
load. Now, Orton walks, preens, and poses
without looking constipated, and we have THQ's
motion capture people to thank. Or maybe ol' RKO
found himself a Diva's carryall bag backstage and
followed his natural instincts? I'm going with the
first. After all, that urban legend has been de-bunked.
I hope.
As for the
wrestling in the ring, most of the moves look great, but
there's still the issue of collision detection. Either
that, or Undertaker possesses the innate ability to
disperse his molecules and pass right through people.
And here I thought he just had the ability to shoot
lightning from his hands, and come back from the
dead constantly no matter whether he was crushed, burned
or buried under 4 tons on dirt. That I could
buy. But come on, Teleportation? That's just
ridiculous~! *Ahem*.
CHARACTERS:
Kind of a
strange line-up of characters this year, and despite the
addition of "ECW" to the game, there's still about 10
superstars shy of the roster they had last year.
That said, there's still your usual suspects like Triple
H, John Cena, Batista and Shawn Michaels, and a slew of
Divas, including the debuts of Kelly Kelly and
Ashley! And unlike her real life counterpart, this Ashley doesn't start
off with every limb on her meter completely
glowing red. That's a plus.
On the male
side, we see several debuts as well. So, if
your dream is to somehow take Kenny Dykstra ALL THE WAY,
BABY, you can do just that. And chances are, if this is
truly your aspiration, your last name is probably
Dykstra. Just saying. The others making their first
ever THQ appearances are Elijah Burke, JTG,
Shad, Marcus Cor Von, MVP, The Sandman, Tommy
Dreamer, Sabu, and CM Punk, sans his Pepsi and
Cobra tattoos. Poor Punk. There's no Cola love at THQ,
apparently. Not even Faygo. Not
even.
Chris Masters and Randy Orton never
did quite grasp the concept of
baseball. |
As for your
commentary teams, you get access to all THREE
broadcast teams depending on what arena you
use. Those announce teams? Well, Jim Ross and
Jerry Lawler (whom I have this sneaking suspicion just
might use a lot of lame analogies about abused
government-issued livestock and pseudonyms for breasts,
instead of you know "calling the match"), Michael Cole
& JBL, and Tazz and JOEY STYLES~! Yes, Joey makes
his return to video game voice work! The last time we
saw him he was calling holds comically called the "Pearl
Necklace" and "Dickie-drop" in ECW's aforementioned
Anarchy Rulz. Something tells me that's not the case
here. The only "dick being dropped" here is Bob Holly,
who's only included in the Nintendo DS version,
apparently. Man. And here I was hoping I'd be
able to virtually violate the trust of
an untrained wrestler by pulverizing him for
no reason. Oh well. Maybe next
year.
And finally, we
have most people's favorite aspect of these games:
THE LEGENDS. This time around
you have RAVISHING RICK
RUDE and TERRY
FUNK to work with. That's
just awesome. And not just for the
reaction my girlfriend just had to my declaration of
Funk being THE HARDCORE
LEGEND.
"He's a porn star? Who'd ever want to have sex with
him?" she
ignorantly said. That's just great. I never had the
heart to correct her and fill her in on the wrestling
connotation of the name. Mostly because Terry Funk
as a porn star holds infinitely more comedic potential.
I mean, who knows what kind of props he'd bring
into the bedroom. Lighting a dildo on fire? Throwing
spermicidal jelly mixed with thumb-tacks into
someone's eyes? Hell, I doubt if he'd even wear a
condom. He IS from the Double-cross Ranch, remember?
Exactly. Besides, what's the worse that could
happen? He's been set on fire and slammed into broken
glass. What's a little STD after
that?
Rounding out
the rest of the stars is Bret Hart, Mick Foley, Steve
Austin and Roddy Piper. Man, it's about time
they've put these guys in a game! Wait. That's right.
They're in like every game. Seriously, I love Bret,
Stone Cold, Mick & Rock, but how about going outside
the box and selecting some OTHER Legends, too? I
mean, it's not like they wouldn't be up for it. I
just saw a video of GREG THE HAMMER VALENTINE
WRESTLING IN SOME TEENAGER'S BACKYARD FOR MONEY.
Throw the poor guy a bone. Or at least get him to
wrestle it. Apparently he'll fight anything for
money. I mean, seriously though, there's a slew of
legends out there to choose from, so why not go for it?
Of course, that might mean actually having to animate
some new people, though. But hey, why render say,
Demolition, when you can just use Rock again, forever?
I'm just not getting into it. "OH MY GOD,
SEAN, HE'S DIFFERENT NOW, HE'S GOT A NEW
HAIRCUT!." Seriously, though, it's something to think
about. For A LOT of people, this is the selling feature
on the game. In fact, you might be surprised how well
and all WWE Legends game would sell. That said,
it's just a minor gripe, because the CAW section
is detailed enough, and with the addition of
the hard-drive theme music option, you can
probably make whatever legend your little heart
desires. So really, no harm, no foul. Or maybe
Fowl. If in fact you chose to create Terry
Taylor or the Gobbledy
Gooker.
XBOX
360 VERSUS PLAYSTATION 3:
There's actually huge differences
between these two platforms as far as the games go.
XBox's graphics come across much more vibrant
and realistic, while PS3's graphics are not nearly as
crisp. I blame the fact that PS3's version is
only broadcast in 720p resolution, while XBox's is
1080p. A HUGE Difference. PS3's animation is
choppier, and you can notice small things like outlines,
which are non-existent in the much more realistic XBox
360 version. So, if that's an issue for you, there
you go. Of course, the other big strike
against PS3 is the aforementioned issue of no
customizable tracks for CAW's. So, for my money, which
usually you'd have to pry from my fat little fingers
with the jaws of life, I think, in this instance, I
prefer the X-Box 360 version, and recommend that, if
you're debating just which version to purchase. But
hey, that's just me.
What Kane never did realize
was, Bobby Lashley was always
the superior dancer, because he "felt" the
music. |
MY WISH-
LIST:
Although, I
enjoyed this game over all, especially due
to the genuine ECW experience, that doesn't mean I
don't have a *few things* I'd love to see remedied
before next year's version is released. Here are a few
of these things:
-The
commentating needs a serious over-haul. Thank god
there's the option to turn it off altogether, because
sometimes, dear god, it takes all my willpower to
not do myself in hara-kiri style with my cumbersome
X-Box controller. Jerry Lawler and Jim Ross's
efforts especially. Basically, their commentary
from the last 2 games has been replicated again, which means once again, you'll have to
hear their nonsensical banter repeating ad nauseam like
a deranged Southern
Teddy
Ruxpin. "You don't
know true happiness until you're married,
JR. ...but then it's too late!" Why the Hell is
this line even in the game? It's annoying to the
highest degree. Heaven forbid, the commentators CALL THE
HOLDS, and not give me detailed explanations of what a
"Limber-tail" and "Scalded dog" is. Dear
God.
-It'd be nice
if you could pick ANY superstar to compete in career
mode with. Apparently the issues with this, is that not
every voice was captured for use. But I don't know about
you, but I don't really need to hear Chavo Guerrero
audibly recite wooden dialogue. Captions are fine. I
know some people are all like "OH NO! NOT READING!", but
hey, screw you. If it means I can take more
than Cena or Batista to a Championship, then it's
clearly worth it. And how about that, eh? Even in video
game form, you can't take some small guys to the
World Title...
-What are the
point of the Divas as playable characters in the game?
You can't even use them in Career mode. What's the
point, really? Does anyone really ever select them
anyway as players? It'd be different if they had a full
year-long storyline you could play that didn't
involve you eventually somehow making out with John
Cena. But without wrestling, they kind of serve no
purpose. Huh. I guess they were going for realism after
all. ;)
-The
aforementioned weight changes to Create-A-Superstar.
More realistic shapes would be nice. Maybe heights, too.
Not everyone is built like a 300 pound
muscle-bound Adonis. Despite Vince McMahon's
praying....
-Customizable
arenas or rings. How cool would it be to be able to
create your own custom banners and
sets?
-More in-depth
Storylines. Once the year ends, you shouldn't have to
recycle storylines or start all over again. What is
this, the actual WWE? It'd be nice if there was at
least 5 WWE calendar years worth of unique
storylines. Or at least maybe unique ones depending on
whom you pick.
-More Legends
(see above).
- Some A.I.
tweaks to how some of the wrestlers actually wrestle.
Nothing is more frustrating then watching a match, and
seeing all six men in the Elimination Chamber repeatedly
climb the structure and jump to their dooms, OVER AND
OVER again, with no psychology. Or in standard matches,
not follow up on a big move, or just wildly swing chairs
at one another like two drunken medieval
knights. It's probably the one real issue that needs to
be addressed by next year's version. Seriously. If
I wanted to watch people with no common sense and
direction do battle, I'd just go to the bus station
and throw a few dollars at the mentally-disabled down
there. You'd be surprised how much damage someone with
Down's Syndrome can do for a half-eaten candy bar. It's
inspiring.
FINAL
THOUGHTS: Once again, as
mentioned, I enjoyed this game and really recommend
it. Some people may make the argument that basically,
the game is just a suped-up version of the
same exact engine, just with
a fresh coat of paint every year, but for everyone
who thinks that, there's no doubt people who like the
familiarity of not having to relearn every facet
of a completely new game, and whom
just look forward to new wrinkles like the ECW
match. For many people, it's like the way WWE is itself.
There's subtle changes, but at the end of the day, it's
easy to jump right in and follow again, even if it's
been a few years since you've last seen it. For those
people, they won't be disappointed. Neither was I. But
maybe that's because, unlike the actual WWE, I didn't
have to sit through a *hilarious* midget sketch, or
listen to Vince cut a 20 minute promo, and instead could
just enjoy WRESTLING. Well, that and pin Triple H
repeatedly with a guy who has "no passion for the
business". Just because I can.
Thumbs
up~!
Sean Carless is a man of many
hats. And he wears those hats to cover an
ever-increasing bald spot. Sean's various scribblings
have been read at Live Audio Wrestling, 411 Mania, Honky
Tonk Man.com, The Toronto Star.com,
Wrestlecrap, and Lethal Wrestling. He has also
cured AIDS.
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