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The following originally appeared at Wrestlecrap.

Ring of Honor, 2002
Text by Derek Burgan

Let's backtrack to the spring of 2002. With ECW dead, Rob Feinstein of RF Video (who was producing all of ECW's popular "fan cam" videos of house shows) realized he would need a new cash cow. After seeing the August 2001 King of the Indies tournament (a show that drew raves from all in attendance, including the Wrestling Observer's Dave Meltzer and Figure Four Weekly's Bryan Alvarez), Feinstein put together a plan to start his own independent company. Instead of being a low rent version of WWE, the new company would focus on having strong matches between many of the top independent workers and deemphasize badly acted skits and screw job finishes.

Booked by fellow ECW employee Gabe Sapolsky, Ring of Honor held its first show, Era of Honor Begins, on February 23, 2002. Highlighted by an epic main event three way match between Low Ki, Christopher Daniels, and "The American Dragon" Bryan Danielson, the company immediately started off with a lot of buzz. In addition to the awesome action provided by those three, Era of Honor Begins also introduced the viewer to Eric "Towelboy" Tuttle.

Don't remember him? Curious as to what the hell a "Towelboy" is? Well, the nickname came from Tuttle's job to wipe the sweat off the ring ropes by using a towel. Acting like a total spaz by frantically racing across the ring while drying the ropes, Tuttle quickly developed a cult following. Longtime ECW fans already recognized Tuttle from his brief appearances for that company during its dying days.

Early in Era of Honor Begins, Xavier was seen backstage talking to an obviously depressed Eric Tuttle. After all...what was he to do now? Where was he to go? What was he to wipe now that all that he loved was gone?

Xavier gave the youngster some sage advice: "give it time."

But Tuttle couldn't do that. He couldn't just stand idly by whilst ropes were in need of de-perspirising, oh no.

And thus, Tuttle made his way to the ring, running around and doing his darndest to ensure that these ropes were completely free from moisture. For their part, the crowd was completely marking out for him, chanting "Wooooooooooooooooooooooooaah!"

A backstage skit had Prince Nana asking Rob Feinstein who his opponent would be that night. Feinstein ran around the building and found Eric Tuttle, who was shirtless and using one of those stretching cords that Big Poppa Pump would flex his biceps out with on Monday Nitro. (We should note that Eric Tuttle's physique was not, in fact, as impressive as Scott Steiner's.)

You see, just like his hero, Dennis Stamp, Eric Tuttle was always ready for his next match.

And unlike Stamp, this night, he was booked - in fact, he was up next against Prince Nana!

Tuttle was excited as all hell and on his way to the ring he was confronted by Steve Corino. The King of Old School had his own sage advice for young Tuttle:

"Hey kid, get yourself over."

Sadly, the Cinderella story was not meant to be. Once inside the ring, Prince Nana quickly destroyed the poor Towelboy.

A total squash match that had Nana do a couple moves to Tuttle, including Nana's running butt-to-the-head deal, before finishing off the Towelboy with a regular suplex.

At ROH's next show on March 30, 2002, Round Robin Challenge, a bizarre skit took place backstage with both Nana and Tuttle lacing up their wrestling boots, as they were to be partners on the show.

Nana turned to Tuttle and said "Kid, there's only one way to get over with Prince Nana." Nana then stood up with his crotch about six inches away from Tuttle's face.

Oh boy, I don't like where this is going...

But then Tuttle thought about it for a second and replied "Oh, I know how to get over…" Tuttle then grabbed his towel and started to shine Nana's boots.

"Now you're learning!" beamed Nana.

The pair came out for their match accompanied by Simply Luscious. Nana cut a never ending promo in the middle of the ring talking about the lack of respect he got from the fans. Tuttle then again shined Nana's boots. When Da Hit Squad (Dan Maff & Monsta Mack) came to the ring, the crowd went bananas. Nana was on the wrong end of a double clothesline, while Tuttle was speared in half by Dan Maff before being the recipient of a Burning Hammer.

By now the Christopher Street Connection, a flaming homosexual tag team that could use its own WrestleCrap induction, had made their way to ringside to taunt Da Hit Squad.

Maff and Mack's response? Pick up the poor Towel Boy and use him as a human dart!

Unfortunately for our swabbing hero, instead of being thrown onto the wrestlers waiting to catch him, he was dumped straight to the ground…

SPLAT!

The Christopher Street Connection offered their services for mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, but Nana pulled Tuttle away and went to the back, presumably for more shoe shining.

And sadly, that would be the last we ever saw of Eric "Towelboy" Tuttle in Ring of Honor.

How the ROH ring ropes were dried of sweat on future shows will be one of the great mysteries of our time.


In addition to writing inductions and the fabulous Gimmick Table here at WrestleCrap, Derek Burgan can also be seen doing DVD reviews and his Wrestling Enjoyment Index for the Wrestling Observer/Figure Four Weekly family of websites, along with writing Opinion Pieces for World Wrestling Insanity. Special thanks to ROH Historian Keith Lipinski.

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TWF FLASHBACK

November 2006

SATIRE: DISCONTINUED WWE XMAS PRODUCTS!

by Sean Carless

With Christmas just around the corner, what better way to spend your few remaining dollars (left over after the seemingly infinite line-up of fucking pay-per-views ) then on the following "quality WWE merchandise!" After all, if they don't move this stuff, and fast, stockholders just might get time to figure out what "plummeting domestic buyrates" means!... and well, I don't think they need to tell you what that means! (Seriously. They're not telling you. Everything is fine! Ahem.).