When, what to my wondering
eyes should suddenly
transpire?
But fucking Marc Mero on
TV calling Vince McMahon a
liar!
With a face frozen with
botox, so unmoving and
cold;
The TV said 'superstar'
yet not a single buy had
he sold.
Faster than you can say
bullshit, more cling-ons they
came,
And they whistled, and
shouted, and called Vince out by
name;
"Now, Orton! Now Hunter!
Now Lashley! And
'Tista!
Their ain't a single one not
juicin', Vince himself not
the least!"
From the dregs of wrestling's
past came even
more bottom-feeders
No one was safe from their
charges, not even the important locker-room
leaders!
Debra claimed
that life with Stone Cold the
punches would fly,
Opening up cans of
whoop-ass that done left her with many a
black eye.
The piston-like rights
rained and the Thesz presses
they flew,
Stomping mudholes in her
ass because of roid-rage and far too much
brew.
Soon however, the
industry rolled on with full dignity
and grace;
Bar any mention of Chris
Benoit, whose proof of existence was
launched deep into
space.
But at least Hunter
returned to the roster, pinning all in
his path,
Not a single tag team, heel
or face would not feel his
wrath.
He was dressed all
in black, and carried a
hammer,
He showed no vulnerability,
not even a stammer;
But still, there wasn't a
thing WWE could not handle!
Well, until 12 dudes got
busted in the Signature Pharmacy
scandal!
Now, some people would be
broken, but Vince was NOT
done;
He said "Fuck you, Mr.
Kennedy" and made a midget his
son!
The "laughs" went on and on
for weeks at a time,
Those of us not ten
wondered if TV this bad was a
crime.
However, Orton versus
Cena soon emerged from
this wreck;
Creating new interest
until The Champ tore off his
pec.
The Marine went down for
8 months, leaving the title in
doubt;
But Hunter stepped forward
saying "I'll win the bout!"
But Orton still got
the gold, and received Hunter's
"Rub";
But not before he and Umaga
were pinned and made to look like a
scrub.
With a thunderous pedigree
and long three-counted
fall,
The Audience was reminded
who should have really stood
tall.
Hunter still had belt
number 12, and I guess he was
pleased,
Because Orton
moved onto Michaels, Skinner's hat and
two wobbly knees.
But
all was not finished, as a Savior returned;
With apathy in the Carolinas
and some new lessons learned.
Don't expect to
get shit in the south unless your name
is Flair;
And for god sakes,
Chris, cut that gay
hair!
And when you don't get over,
I'm sure Hunter'll be
ready;
He'll take your
Wrestlemania slot and not 'cause he's
petty.
It's just that there's no one
left, and he IS THE GAME;
It really doesn't matter that
every year the Main event
is the same!
WWE
never changes and won't 'til Vince
is not here;
So, Merry Christmas to
all!... and expect the same shit next
year!
